I am so bent today. It’s been a pretty crappy day, to be honest – I mean really, any day that starts out with an exam just has to be. I slept in, so no shower for me. Get to school at the regular time despite that (?) and then I must have missed the Nomes because I didn’t see her. Went to class, wrote the essay exam… I don’t know how I did, because my brain hadn’t really started yet. I feel okay about it, but then who knows if that’s any indicator? Then in my next class, I found I wasn’t really able to pay attention. Missed Nomes again, came home to find that Turbine’s screwed up with thier client again so I can’t get into my AC account – which ticked me off something fierce.
And then I was going to try and relax by being on the couch and reading, when J goes over and turns on the TV. “Put on your headphones.” But! I’m sick of traffic noise, computer noise any noise… sigh. I don’t know how to fix that either, because he’s right, he lives here too and I can’t expect to get my own way all the time. I went into the bedroom, but there’s not enough light and I just get overwhelmed with the urge to clean it – even though we don’t have $ now to do any laundry – which would just frustrate me because that’s the main thing in there to clean. I suppose I could change the sheets…sigh.
Thing is, everything is really pissing me off more than it should, so I’m thinking my monthly hormone imbalance is upon me. *checks date* yep. Damn.
Then I get a call from work. They want me earlier – which is fine, I need the hours, but it will be a stretch to be “nice” this weekend. I wonder if they’d be terribly offended if I went looking for a better-paying job?
I picked up some of my homework, but I’m at odds with that too because I’m not sure where I want to go with any of that either – there are so many things to finish that I don’t know where to get started. Not the time to start either because I’m waay to self-critical at the moment too. (This is my ‘you’re too dumb to spell anything right’ mood, so: counterproductive).
The question that’s making me most bitchy these days is “what are you going to do now?” esp since this is my last semester for my degree. Here’s the answer: I DON’T KNOW!! I hate to say that, there are so many things I could do, but I don’t know where to start. To be honest I’d like nothing more than to make a living writing things – but how on earth do I get started there? And where is there? FUCK.
I hate this. I’m cranky, restless and emotional. Stupid PMS. *shakes fist*. Rrr.